Most people have got positive feelings by gifts and presents. In my case it makes me nervous.
The word gift, tells me that it’s about a thing you give without expecting something in return.
How the word ‘present’ actually is related to the gift is not really stated. My guess is that it has to do with the French word for ‘presence’ which means that you’re on that spot/that you’re there and to prove it ,you give something.
In a multi cultural live I find any occasion which involves presents/gifts very uncomfortable.
?What occasions are appropriate to give presents of gifts?
?How much do you (want to) spend on a present? Based on how close you are? based on financial situation? based on what you got before? ?What’s the local custom?
?Do you embarass somebody with a too small/big or too cheap/expensive present?
?What can you give to who? Can a man give a present to a woman or visa versa?
?Do you give everybody the same value? ?Do you give something you think the other would appreciate?
?Do you give something you like and show something of your identity? ?Do you open presents or not?
?How much effort is the actual presentation/packing?
To be honest, I still don’t know, how to act cultural intelligent in these situations.
I can’t say to my 4 children that they can’t accept all the birthday party invitations because off the expenses of the presents? Can I? Or embarrass the birthday boy or -girl with a cheap present because I rather spend my money on a family diner in a nice restaurant? What do I give my host? bring in a dish/a bottle of wine? (which might be insulting as if you expect there won’t be enough). Chocolates (was she not on a diet?) or again flowers, a bouquet or a roomfilling arrangement? Should I decorate my gift or not?
The best thing to do is ask arround what others do in those situations. But still……
Me as a receiver, I feel very uncomfortable receiving overpriced presents, which I can’t and won’t return.
On the other hand it also makes me Feel Good that I mean so much to somebody else.
I, also do love to give presents from which I’m sure it would make the other happy, even if they’re expensive. A GIFT, but that’s from the heart.
Actually this tells a lot about me; for me PRESENTS are a kind of trade. A trade of a good feeling/gratitude/happiness or a return present. That’s probably also the reason that I like to see when somebody is unwrapping my present. And exactly the reason why I very much understand people who rather don’t unwrap untill they’re alone in case they’re dissapointed.
This is my love and hate story with presents and gifts.
I’m very interested in other -juicy- stories and experiences from all over the world.